November 2010
4 posts
I think I might be in love...
fiverr.com, you complete me.
All alone...more or less
Red Dwarf becomes a much more depressing show without the laugh track.
October 2010
4 posts
Revelation
I just found out you can play as the duck in Duck Hunt. I played this game for hours upon hours between the ages of 5 and 8 and never knew this was possible. I can only imagine what kind of person I’d have turned out to be if I had been able to play as the duck. I weep for my wasted childhood.
1st 30 seconds of new song. Me and guitar (been...
August 2010
5 posts
:(
I had to reformat my computer today due to virus overload. Everything is gone now. My music, my games, my songs, my stories. Basically, everything I love has disappeared into the aether.
In other news, Soctt Pilgrim vs. the World is a good movie. After I first saw it, I was unsure of whether I liked it or not, but now, three days later, I have decided that I love it.
I've made a terrible mistake
I’m supposed to take a plane for the first time today. It has just now dawned on me that I will be traveling a million miles above the ground in a tiny metal boxthat works on voodoo physics. Fuck.
More Wikicomedy
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thumb_wrestling
Something about the page image, a US soldier thumb wrestling an Iraqi boy, seems in poor taste to me.
July 2010
13 posts
Wikicomedy
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Married_and_maiden_names#Children
This wikipedia page posits a scenario in which a woman named Jane Dice and a man named John Klax have a child, to whom they give the surname Dilax. A review of the history page reveals that until December 7, 2009, the page put forth the slightly more reasonable but still unlikely story of Jane Peak and John Dixon and their child,...
My favorite English poem
I work all day, Said Simple John, Myself a house to buy. I work all day, Said Simple John, But Pierrot wondered why. For Pierrrot loved the long white road, And Pierrot loved the moon, And Pierrot loved a star-filled sky, And the breath of a rose in June.
I have one wife, Said Simple John, And,faith,I love her yet. I have one wife, Said Simple John, But Pierrot left Pierrette. For Pierrot saw a...
“I think of the postmodern attitude as that of a man who loves a very cultivated...”
– Umberto Eco on Postmodern Literature
A drug name that sounds like it should be a metal...
maviswillsaveus:
“Serevent Diskus”
I took Serevent when I was a kid for Asthma a few times. At the time, it was not a disk but a regular inhaler. I hated it and its chemical taste. It was the dreaded green inhaler. I much preferred the yellow inhaler (Proventil) or the pink inhaler (don’t remember what the hell that was).
I imagine the disk thing is because of the ban of CFC-based...
Decimation
http://hypem.com/track/956291/Solange+Knowles+-+Stillness+Is+The+Move
Solange Knowles > Dirty Projectors
Proclamation
Solange Knowles > Beyonce Knowles
Revelation
I just realized that the Li’l John referred to in Vampire Weekend’s Oxford Comma is the rapper.
Skeet skeet, indeed.
Observation
People who attend anti-Pitchfork parties are virtually indistinguishable from the people who attend Pitchfork.
I write like...
http://iwl.me/
Plug in some text and see what famous author you are subconsciously robbing with your every word. I apparently write like the late David Foster Wallace, except when I’m doing what I think of as Raymond Carver/Ernest Hemingway pastiche, which is apparently a dead-on Lovecraft.
The Real Deal With Bill McNeal
I’ve been watching a lot of NewsRadio lately, a sitcom from the 90s for which I have a lot of affection. I think it may have been my first “favorite show,” if I ignore such childhood indulgences as Power Rangers, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Animaniacs and so on. I remember watching when it first ran on NBC, then the syndication on A&E, then the DVDs when I was in college....
June 2010
4 posts
Music
Apparently, Chicago just won some kind of hockey tournament. Their preferred means of celebration is to drive around in the middle of the night honking horns and yelling about hawks.
Dark days, indeed.
Music For A Film Strip
Electronica...
Computer-Generated Music
http://www.wired.com/epicenter/2010/06/5-mash-ups-of-music-and-artificial-intelligence/
Basically, algorithmically generated music is the new hotness. On the one hand, I really enjoy off-putting computer music, so the idea of being able to just sing and have a program turn it into fully-accompanied music is very interesting. On the other hand, I’ve spent a lot of time learning music theory...
May 2010
3 posts
Haven’t posted a song here in a while....
WatchICP 4 lyfe
April 2010
1 post
Greeting Cards
April, it seems, is birthday season for my Chicago friends, as September was for my Princeton ones. Thusly, I spent about twenty minutes yesterday browsing the birthday card selection at Walgreen’s. It was horrible. One likes to believe that one is an original, freethinking sort, that one’s ideas and emotions cannot be expressed by a $2 piece of cardstock mass-produced by a faceless,...
March 2010
2 posts
Epiphanies
Playing dress-up while watching Cry Baby at 5:00 AM is an almost sure sign that your life has taken a wrong turn at some point.
February 2010
2 posts
I'm Back, Fools
My computron has finally arrived in Chicago, allowing me permanent access to the digital delights which I so often crave. I will not lie. There will be a culling. Humanity will tremble. All will suffer under my iron fist.
And here’s a picture of a hipster dog.
Barista Coffee House
maviswillsaveus:
PROS: Wide selection of board games, teas. Friendly vibe. Feels like the hippest luncheonette on Main Street in a small Southern town.
CONS: Coffee is mediocre. Joe cheats at Scrabble.
Lies. Somebody is just a sore loser. It’s sad, really. And shameful.
December 2009
1 post
Homesickness
It’s strange how very tall buildings never seem all that tall to me. I refer to buildings like the Empire State Building and the Sears Tower and every other feat of architectural daring-do. Up close, craning my neck upward, they seem no larger than other skyscrapers, really. Squinting from far away they seem downright small. Only inside them do they seem very tall to me, when I can see out...
November 2009
3 posts
Joe Update, Nov. 15 edition
Moving Update: Moving to my new place today. Super excited. Hope I don’t get stabbed.
Beatles Lyrics Relevant to My Life Update: Out of college, money spent / See no future, pay no lots of rent / All the money’s gone, nowhere to go.
Employment Update; Still only freelance stuff. Radio Shack is apparently to good for Ol’ Joe.
Roommate Update: They crazy.
Beard Update: In that...
More meat, please!
I’m with Erica. I grew up around farm animals. I saw my first pig slaughtered when I was six or seven. And then we ate the pig. It was delicious. I do have some concerns over eating meat, but they stem from the environmental impact of raising large numbers of domestic animals and the unnecessarily terrible conditions of the commercial meat industry, not the simple fact that I’m eating...
October 2009
5 posts
Joe Update October Edition
Chicago Update: I like Chicago. I think I will live here for a while.
Housing Update: Looking at rehabbing a warehouse with a bunch of artists I met on craigslist. In the fantasy scenario I have concocted for this, I’ll be the gruff but lovable writer and play keyboard in the band we form together. It’ll be like Rent, except not stupid and poorly written. Also, hopefully less heroine...
That Busker Sucked
That busker was a prick. I don’t have a job either, but I don’t yell at people on the street. Good job, busker. You learned to play the guitar. Awesome. No one’s ever done that before. Congratulations. You deserve everyone’s money.
He wasn’t even that good. There was a guy in the subway station who was much better, and one million times more polite. He got a dollar...
RE: Fucking Lies
It was the kind of shopping trip where you watch someone ruled by indecision wander like a lost child, forever uncertain of her own goals and desires. A harried operation in which every choice is fraught with potential peril. You point to things which look awesome and sweet, but are rebuffed by one who seeks to drape herself in drabness and utilitarian frumpery. There is great need to vascillate...
District 9 sucks: A polemic
*Spoiler Warning*
I heard that District 9 was a good movie. I heard it was a thoughtful film that explored contemporary issues through the lens of Speculative Fiction. I heard that it was the best film of the summer. I was fucking lied to. District 9 is a terrible movie that deserves nothing but jeers and hate. Fortunately, these are items I possess in great supply
The byword for this film is...
Travel Haiku
Leaving Brooklyn soon
After week in the city.
Fun in Chicago?
September 2009
4 posts
Up Late, Feeling Great
So I recently quit smoking again, and following a short withdrawal period, I find myself with near-boundless energy as my metabolism corrects itself. I barely use this blog anymore, but I think I’ve found a wonderful use for it now in these wee hours; explanations of how you can be as good and awesome as me. And in honor of my friends’ new blog, I will begin by recommending to you the...
New Song. New Sound. New Hotness.
